Belly of the Beast

I believe that everybody has that little bit of evil in them that could potentially allow them to do violent things to others or themselves. Even myself, I am not a very dark, or aggressive person but if somebody pushed the right buttons on the wrong day I believe that I could get ugly. In trying to find this dark shadow that lies within me, I pretty much know who I am but it made me explore it even more which made me kind of angry. I always think that I am a nice person to everybody and in turn my boyfriend thinks that I get stepped on for that. One day I just feel that I may snap at the next person that walks all over me. For example, my boss at work thinks that it is okay to punish his employees by cutting there hours when they can not do something he has asked. Most recently he has cut my hours because he called me to come in on a day that I am scheduled off, and the reason I am off is because of school. He later then cut my hours the whole next week on the hours I can work because of the fact that I could not make it in when he needed me. This definitely pissed me off unbelievably but I let it go because that is what I usually do. What I really wanted to do was say f-u pal. I have been here seven fucking years and that is the way you treat me. Go stick it where the sun don't shine. II would love to say something like that. Or even just kick the shit out of someone one day, but it would have to be for a good reason. But I am definitely capable of doing it and I am strong enough physically, just mentally I would feel guilty after. Sure, during the time of adrenalin pumping it is great but than afterwards I would just assume I would feel like shit for hurting someone else, even if they had it coming. But, like I said one day someone will catch me on the wrong day at the wrong time and just push the right buttons for a slappy.